Super Mom

Does anyone else have difficulty determining priorities? It seems more challenging once children are added to the picture.  At least it is for me.  Or maybe it's just is more apparent when you have kids. 
Since May I have had some fairly serious health issues which has forced me to take a long hard look at my lifestyle and my priorities.  Now that I'm not able to do all the things I was doing on my own it has been very eye opening and humbling to allow others to help. 
You see, I'm a "Super Mom".  I never saw myself this way.  I was just doing what I thought was necessary to keep our family running smoothly.  I've come to find out that I am a bit of a perfectionist (surprise, surprise to all my friends who have been telling me that for years).  I didn't realize this until others had to take over my responsibilities.  For example, I hang clothes a certain way, I put them away a certain way, toys have homes and should go back there when they are not being played with, I shop for groceries a certain way, the list goes on and on........order rules.  Now, this isn't all bad.  Order can be good.  Setting boundaries is good.  It's not good, however, when there is no room for change or modification. 
I first noticed my "Super Momism" coming out when a very sweet friend was helping with laundry and put all the clothes on the hangers "backwards".  I literally started feeling anxious.  No joke.....I was having an anxiety attack over hangers.  To the point that after she left I went into the closet and rehung all the clothes.  I could barely get out of bed to shower.  Ridiculous!
The second aha moment came when my loving, sweet, amazing husband went to the grocery store (with a list and instructions for using coupons from Super Mom).  He did his best, but Super Mom's expectations were not met and I let him know it.  Not only was he not pleased with my disapproval (can't blame him) I was actually feeling justified.  It didn't occur to me that I could be wrong until after the kids were in bed and I had some quiet to think about the situation.  When I really thought about it I was letting a box of cereal get in between me and my husband.  Right then and there I asked God to change my heart and my expectations.  I went to my husband (who was avoiding me....rightfully so) and sincerely apologized for my completely insane behavior.
It was time to change.  The next day I started allowing people to really help me....including my husband who was desperately wanting to help, but not wanting to "make me upset".  Since then I have felt a huge burden lifted.  My relationship with my husband has grown stronger. I'm spending more time with my kids instead of worrying about the next thing on my list.  I still have a long way to go, but at least I'm going!  Joyce Meyer says, "I'm not where I need to be, but thank God I'm not where I used to be.)
So, to all the Super Moms out there take off your cape and play with your kids!  You can put the cape back on after bed!!