Super Mom

Does anyone else have difficulty determining priorities? It seems more challenging once children are added to the picture.  At least it is for me.  Or maybe it's just is more apparent when you have kids. 
Since May I have had some fairly serious health issues which has forced me to take a long hard look at my lifestyle and my priorities.  Now that I'm not able to do all the things I was doing on my own it has been very eye opening and humbling to allow others to help. 
You see, I'm a "Super Mom".  I never saw myself this way.  I was just doing what I thought was necessary to keep our family running smoothly.  I've come to find out that I am a bit of a perfectionist (surprise, surprise to all my friends who have been telling me that for years).  I didn't realize this until others had to take over my responsibilities.  For example, I hang clothes a certain way, I put them away a certain way, toys have homes and should go back there when they are not being played with, I shop for groceries a certain way, the list goes on and on........order rules.  Now, this isn't all bad.  Order can be good.  Setting boundaries is good.  It's not good, however, when there is no room for change or modification. 
I first noticed my "Super Momism" coming out when a very sweet friend was helping with laundry and put all the clothes on the hangers "backwards".  I literally started feeling anxious.  No joke.....I was having an anxiety attack over hangers.  To the point that after she left I went into the closet and rehung all the clothes.  I could barely get out of bed to shower.  Ridiculous!
The second aha moment came when my loving, sweet, amazing husband went to the grocery store (with a list and instructions for using coupons from Super Mom).  He did his best, but Super Mom's expectations were not met and I let him know it.  Not only was he not pleased with my disapproval (can't blame him) I was actually feeling justified.  It didn't occur to me that I could be wrong until after the kids were in bed and I had some quiet to think about the situation.  When I really thought about it I was letting a box of cereal get in between me and my husband.  Right then and there I asked God to change my heart and my expectations.  I went to my husband (who was avoiding me....rightfully so) and sincerely apologized for my completely insane behavior.
It was time to change.  The next day I started allowing people to really help me....including my husband who was desperately wanting to help, but not wanting to "make me upset".  Since then I have felt a huge burden lifted.  My relationship with my husband has grown stronger. I'm spending more time with my kids instead of worrying about the next thing on my list.  I still have a long way to go, but at least I'm going!  Joyce Meyer says, "I'm not where I need to be, but thank God I'm not where I used to be.)
So, to all the Super Moms out there take off your cape and play with your kids!  You can put the cape back on after bed!!

To Each His Own

For those of you who don't know, my middle child has Sensory Processing Disorder.  SPD can be trying at times, limiting at other times, but can also be quite rewarding.  I recently viewed some posts on a SPD "support" page from some moms who were very focused on the limitations of their child; comparing them to children of the same age or younger w/o SPD.  It seems to me that it is very easy to look at the ways a special needs child does not "measure up" to a child who does not deal with the same challenges.  It's easy to point out all the things that they can't do and in the mean time we neglect to praise all the wonderful things that they can do.

My son has a laundry list of areas and skills that he hasn't mastered (and may never master) like other children of his age (holding a pencil, cutting with scissors....).  However, he has some skills that children of his age can't come close to and may never be able to do.  At the age of 3 my son can tell you ever type of road construction machine imaginable (actually, he was 2 when he first started naming them all).  He can point out makes and models of cars as we drive down the road.  He knows things that I don't know (his dad taught him).  He knows every toy he owns and knows when one goes missing. (My 6 yr old daughter may have a toy missing for months before she realizes it's gone!)  The list of his strengths goes on and on.

My point is this:  although it sometimes is necessary to make comparisons about your child's mental and physical development don't get so caught up in their shortcomings that you forget to see how special and amazing God made your baby.  Every night I pray with my children and thank God for making them just the way they are; special and unique.  I want more than anything for my children to love themselves the way God loves them and to see the best in themselves (not their shortcomings).  If I focus on their limitations, so will they, but if I focus on their strengths....so will they.

Rant complete.  :)

Welcome!

I am very excited to write my first blog.  If you've found me thru Mother's Touch.  I'm so glad you stopped by!  I'm a little sad that I will not be able to lead the group for now, but am excited to be able to communicate with all of you and have a place to share ideas, gossip about our children and connect with each other.
I'm new to blogging, but my hope is that we can post what's happening in our area, share play dates, find the best kid friendly restaurants and I may even post some of my craft ideas.  I do love a good craft!

I hope you all had a great summer and I look forward to hearing from you!!
God Bless,
Aimee